Navigating Adulting || Doing Life With Jesus As The Big Picture - www.theblackwriter.co

Reading Time: 5mins 3secs || Navigating Adulting || Doing Life With Jesus As The Big Picture 

 

“A heart fixed on Jesus will not sway”

Tamunotonye Levy-Braide

 

It’s been a madhouse in my head for a couple of months. 

No one told me adulting was going to hit this hard. I thought it would be like the movies. Move to a big city, get my dream job, finally have all the freedom I need, and meet my prince charming. Happily ever after yeah? 

Haq haq haq, jokes on me I guess. 

I’m an adult now, and it looks nothing like my dreams. 

{Oh, I’d like to add that right now, I’m writing from my heart. I’ll let the words just flow. It’ll be like a conversation between me and you. Adding some structure to this will take away the beauty.}

 

I’ve struggled for so long trying to have that dream life, dream house and you know, dream everything. In the past, I’ve also tried to press pause on some aspects of my life waiting for that perfect moment or time when things fall into place. Honestly, I feel as though all these have blinded me from seeing all the good and beauty that’s right in front of me. 

 

Last year was a roller coaster of emotions. At a certain point, I was depressed because of all the financial struggles I experienced. I wrote about it, and one of the highlights was where I debunked that theory of life having a big picture that we all need to work up to. I believed that there was no big picture, and living your life like there was, only ended up creating unnecessary pressure. I still have the same opinion but there’s a twist to it now. Anyways, in that post, I had mentioned that life was more like a movie with different scenes and genres. Some days it’s a comedy, other days thriller, or even romance. It’s not fixed and keeps changing. So looking at just one picture, and hoping that it turns out that way seems like a recipe for disaster.  

 

Read: The Type of Depression No One Talks About – Money Induced Depression

 

If I’m being honest, looking at life as a movie relieved me of some pressures and weight that I carried around. I stopped striving to have that picture-perfect life. After all, who’s to say what is perfect? 

 

Now there’s a big but. I had dropped all the weight, I appreciated my season, and tried not to worry about the future. But for some reason, I still found myself being overwhelmed, anxious, and depressed. It felt like my brain working against me. One worry is gone, and the next thing, it finds more things to worry about. 

 

So what is the solution? The big picture, the pressure, and the weight were all gone. But I still felt some type of way months after. Hmmm. Writing this takes me back to those nights I would cry myself to sleep because of how low I felt. Or those times I broke down in taxis, sigh. This journey hasn’t been easy. 

 

Navigating Adulting || Doing Life With Jesus As The Big Picture - www.theblackwriter.co

 

Anyways, I had let go of everything that seemed heavy, but I still felt weighed down. So what is the solution? Was I looking at things wrongly? Was there a big picture I should have been looking at? What, for heaven’s sake?

 

Late-night tears, community, knowing the word, more study, and building a more intimate relationship with Jesus led me to the answer to my questions. There is a big picture, and that picture is Jesus. He is the end goal, and everything is about him. I realised that I had been trying to solve my life’s problems on my own. Yes, I was a believer, but rating myself honestly, I had not come into full consciousness of who I was in Christ. I’ve grown, and with growth comes lessons and new perspectives. 

 

Adulting was throwing lemons, and I was struggling to make lemonade. Let’s look at it this way, Jesus had the recipe to the lemonade, I knew and believed. But, I chose to google, ask people, and do it on my own. I completely forgot that I had a loving father. He gave me the gift of the Holy Spirit and wants me to fix my gaze on him while he leads me through this journey. He is my source. 

 

Remember the story of the Israelites? The snakes’ tormented them, and all they had to do was fix their eyes on the bronze snake. 

 

Anyways, knowing this and fully coming into consciousness of it brought a twist into how I navigate this thing called adulting. My eyes should be fixed on Jesus. 

Read: Navigating Adulting || Scriptures For When Overwhelmed

 

Okay, let’s rewind a little bit.

 

Remember that dream life I envisioned as a child? That one that was as a result of what the media portrayed. The one that made us all impatient, remember? They didn’t show us the complete picture. I’m 24 and I’ve done adulting long enough to know that the perfect life is not a life without down or low times. It’s a life that has somehow found a rhythm and knows how to navigate the meandering journey of life. It’s a life that is grounded, and even when the wind blows, it dances. It’s a life that even when it breaks, it doesn’t die, it’s reborn. 

 

So you see that dream house, dream man, etc I wanted, it turns out I had it. I couldn’t see it because it didn’t look like the picture I had in my head. What was in my head was so flawed. It was formed from the constant consumption of things that didn’t matter. And because I had taken it in for so long, It was all I could see. 

 

Adulting and growing up is beautiful. That anxiety and joy we felt when we were children looking forward to adult life shouldn’t die when we eventually become adults. Adulting should be fun. But for this to happen, we have to go into it embracing the season and all that it comes with. Tough decisions have to be made. Responsibilities will fall on our laps and sometimes it’s going to be so frustrating. And in those moments, instead of comparing your present situation to that perfect picture in your mind, compare it to Jesus. He is the perfect big picture. And you’re allowed to see it as a movie with changing scenes. Trust me, sometimes life will pull up on you fast but then remember who the director of the movie is and also remember that his end goal should be your end goal. 

 

Back to storytime. 

 

The key thing that has changed in how I’m navigating adulting and managing my mental health is rest. Physical, mental and soul rest in Jesus. When I started typing this, It was a madhouse in my head but I wasn’t scared or worried because I’m learning how to rest in Jesus. I’m learning that he has my back. It’s been a long process of getting to this point but I think I’m doing way better. And I’ve also noticed that the more I rest, the more I have strong convictions when adulting hits me. This rest has also changed my perspective. I see problems and hard times differently. They are all seasons and in each season, I learn lessons. 

 

Another thing I’m learning is that Papa is more interested in forming me rather than being provisional. I have a rich inheritance in Christ and right now, that’s all that matters. 

 

This is my second post in the Navigating Adulting Series. In the first one, I shared some scriptures that have helped me over time. You should check out that post. 

Navigating Adulting || Doing Life With Jesus As The Big Picture - www.theblackwriter.co

 

Dear young adult, it doesn’t have to be hard and overwhelming, rest in Jesus. 

 

Navigating Adulting || Doing Life With Jesus As The Big Picture - www.theblackwriter.co

 

How are you currently dealing with adulting?

Photo Credit: @Stuffedbox

 

*Disclaimer: The thoughts in this post are entirely mine. In this post I’m sharing my own journey and in no way imposing this on anyone. I am no mental health expert, I speak from a personal point. I strongly believe that Jesus is the way and fixing our gaze on him gives us all the strength we need. 

 

 

Catch up on some of my recent posts

The Journey of My Evolving Creativity

On Dealing With Procrastination, Perfectionism, and Comparison

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